While I was in the hair salon recently, I had a wonderful discussion about men and intimidation. It was along the line of similar conversations I have had with my single friends, both males and females. It seems like a successful and beautiful woman can be intimidating to men. They may be interested but they won’t pursue. Maybe I’m old-fashioned in expecting a man to pursue me and not the other way around. But I don’t feel I should have to. I believe what it states in Proverbs 18:22(NIV): “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.”
Along those lines, I have begun to think that maybe intimidation serves as a form of protection. Maybe those guys who are intimidated by you shouldn’t be in your life anyway. Is it God trying to spare you from ones who are unworthy of you? Because I truly don’t understand how women can make themselves less intimidating to a man that is intimidated by her. She can smile, she can laugh, she can even be his friend or coworker, but that won’t stop that feeling of intimidation. Should she stop achieving, stop making a good salary or dumb herself down? Would that stop the intimidation?
We are all imperfect beings trying to improve ourselves. I know for one that I have a list of flaws, but I am constantly working to improve myself. No, I don’t always get it right or say the right things. But I am trying. But one thing I can’t stop being is myself. And if that is intimidating, how am I supposed to change it? How is any female supposed to make herself less intimidating? I truly believe that as I walk along this road called life that if it is in God’s will, I will meet the right person. Who will see me beyond all of my degrees and success for the true me. The vulnerable me. I think the same goes for any other woman who may feel like where are the good men? I believe that there are plenty of good men out there, but they all are not for me. I only need one. And sometimes good things take time. And isn’t that all we have? But I can’t nor should any other woman live with the worry that she is single because she is intimidating. It’s beyond our control and honestly those men were probably not the best fit for her in the first place. The right one won’t be intimidated. Or if he is, he will push past that and introduce himself with a simple word: “Hello”.