I once heard it said that “Courage isn’t the absence of fear, but the ability to act in its presence.” I wish I could remember the person who wrote it, but I am blanking right now. I had planned to tell you all about my study break hour that I spent exploring Artscape (its a huge arts festival in Baltimore that will have to wait until a later post), but a conversation with a Hopkins bus driver changed all of that:
Driver: “So, what are you in school for?”
Me: ” I am getting my master’s of public health.”
Driver: “What will happen if you finish and don’t like it?”
Me: ” I am not worried. I have the ability to choose my courses and can pick what I like.”
Driver: ” That’s great. I really wish I could do something else. I am tired of driving this bus.”
Me: “Why don’t you? What do you want to do?”
Driver: ” I don’t know. I want to fly and explore. I am tired of seeing the same things.”
Me: “What’s holding you back?”
Driver: “I don’t know. Procrastination?”
The conversation ended there, but I wanted to ask him, “What are you waiting for?” I don’t know if there will ever be the right time or if all of the ducks will be in a row. The finances may not be there, you may not have the support of your family, but if it is your dream don’t you think it is worth pursuing? Now, I am not talking blind pursuit–I think some sort of thought process should go into any big change, but you should at least explore your dreams and see if they are feasible. And if they don’t seem feasible, pray on it or ask someone whom you really trust’s opinion. Ultimately, you have to go with your gut. What is deep inside? What are the desires of your heart? How can you make them happen? What steps can you take to get closer?
When I decided to go back to school post PhD, I was considered crazy by some. I know my brother thinks I will be a perpetual student….lol But I felt that this was the step I needed to take for my dreams to come to fruition. It definitely is not cheap to go to Johns Hopkins, but I am stepping out on faith knowing that God is directing my path. I don’t have all of the answers, but I feel that my choice was the right one for me. I know that God is opening up bigger things and preparing my path. Maybe you don’t believe in God as I do, but I feel like the inner conscious or “universe” is calling out to you. You may yearn for something and you are too afraid to make that first step.
It is so easy to get comfortable in life-you have a job, a family, a husband, a wife, etc and you feel that you have arrived. But you are still alive, so you must have a greater purpose on this earth. What is it? Are you striving towards your destiny? If not, what are you waiting for??????